ULTIMATE MEGA MIX

This was the first song I wrote and created, as a surprise song that my husband would discover in our shared Apple Music account. But it became sooooo addictive for the two of us, that it inspired me making the rest of the first album.

I wanted to write a love song to my husband, but I thought it would be funnier to put my jokey spin on it. We’ve been playing the “I love you MORE” game (that many couples are familiar with) for over 20 years now, sometimes taking it to great over-the-top lengths. So what better than a “diss track” for how much my love is stronger than his? (I’m fully expecting a “retaliation track” from him at some point, where he says HIS love is actually stronger. As if!!).

What started as an inside-joke turned into an instantly relatable hit. and launched DJ Rojo’s songwriting career! (P.S. – “The Luckiest” in the lyrics is a reference to the Ben Folds track, which has been “our song” for 20 years).

This is the “Epic Mix” from my album of remixes, because this is how I wanted the ending to be…

Thankfully I haven’t had any full 100% “Vacations From Hell”. Although I’ve had vacations with plenty of bad moments – haven’t we all? (The song is an almagamation of multiple trips that had some occasional unfortunate incidents). Luckily there’s always enough good stuff that happens, that the trips ultimately get saved.

But there have been some vacations that have come pretty darn close. Those times when nothing seems to be going right…

Anyone in the gay community will tell you that there’s an, uh… trend that tends to happen where guys seem to basically date “clones” of themselves. 🙈 Here in Barcelona, especially in the “bear community,” the phenomenon is quite strong. So I thought I’d poke a little fun at it….

I apparently know a LOT of “Tonys”. (Or Anthonys, or other variations. Heck, I’m a kind of “Tony” variant myself).

This song isn’t really about any of them (or is it?), and the story isn’t true (or is it?). But we’ve seen this before, haven’t we? This song might be a spiritual sequel to “Bone Your Clone” – that drama between similar-looking, similar-named guys that you keep hearing about from gossiping friends but you can’t ever keep track of….

CONTAINS EXPLICIT LYRICS

Before my spinal injury while I was still a teen (see “I Fell Off a Cliff” below), I would have probably been classified as a major “bottom”.

But after my accident, it became a little more complicated, yet I would still occasionally do it.

However, after another physical trauma I suffered more recently, it became even more difficult for multiple reasons. So bottoming is simply something I can’t really do with confidence any more (even though I wish I could).

Topping is not really my thing, but I will try if I have to. I’d just rather not. So… apparently that makes me a “Side”. Sadly Sides are just NOT popular in the gay world at all. So yeah… this topic needed a song. It’s become one of my favorites, musically — it’s almost a shame I can’t share it more widely. 🤪

I’m allergic to alcohol, immune to marijuana, and I’ve never done hard drugs. So of course, growing up and going to parties, other people insisted that it was absolutely impossible that I could have any fun. After all, how could I possibly enjoy myself if I wasn’t completely drunk, stoned out of my mind, or barely making any sense at all???

So yeah… I’ve had a lot of “parties of one” in my lifetime….

This is the “Dude What the Fuck” mix from my album of remixes.

I think everyone knows who I’m talking about in this song.

That annoying, pestering little fuck…

As someone who’s had crutches for over three decades, I wanted to address that in a song somehow. The “Crutch Boy” in the song isn’t supposed to be ME, per se, but I still relate to him.

He’s overly optimistic, and just wants to “keep on dancing,” despite how the world might treat him…

This one really captured the ’80s feel I was going for…

This is the “He’s Had it Hard” mix from my album of remixes.

Any time my husband and I are out somewhere, or watching something on TV, and we see something cute or stupid or silly — we immediately shout “YOU!”

Basically… everything is YOU. Yes, even that pile of poop making a frown. Isn’t that so romantic???

On April 28, 2025, all the power went out in mainland Spain, Portugal, and parts of France. This was not the first city-wide blackout I’ve experienced in my life, but definitely the first that affected a whole country. Without internet or even cell service (everyone was trying to use it, so it became unsuable), it became super evident that we as a society are just NOT prepared for events like this. 🙈

It lasted less than a day for most, but it made me wonder… what would happen if it lasted much longer? How would people cope and react? It made me think of the show “Carol and the End of the World” — many would probably just want to party as if the world was ending.

I’m pretty sure most people listening to this song will find at least one line of the lyrics that pertains to them (if not several).

We are ALL basic bitches….

…some more than others. 😜

I just wanted to make something super sweet about my husband and I. My favorite thing about him is how we can have these “laugh attacks” together, and how ONLY the two of us would find what we’re laughing about actually funny.

It was maybe a bit “too sweet” at first, so I felt it needed something else to give it an “edge.” Oh, right — death!! That gave it the perfect balance it needed. I’m sure you can relate — those times you are laughing so hard, you can’t breathe and you think you might die?

Now that I’m in my 50s, my idea of what I find attractive in men has broadened a lot. But for most of my life, I was just “bear”-obsessed (all my boyfriends were bears, and then I married one).

So this is definitely a song that reflects how I felt growing up and a good chunk of my adult life. My husbear thinks this will be a hit at various “Bear Events” — we’ll see about that… 🙈

Every once in a while, something happens at home with my husband (something falls, he trips, weird things happen) — and he will inevitably always blame it on a “gremlin” that we have living with us. It became obvious to me that this gremlin needed its own song!

I’ve been asking my friends to give me ideas for songs, and one friend mentioned his recent (and infuriating) attempt to try and get Lady Gaga tickets for her Barcelona concert.

TicketMaster has had a criminal monopoly on ticket sales for forever now, and anyone that’s had to use them knows the absolute frustration that I portray in this song….. 😅

So I fall down….

… A LOT!

2025 might be the year I’ve fallen the most, which is quite frustrating. I can just complain about it, or….

…I can create a new dance craze!! Sounds like the right thing to do!

With “Promises” (from the 2nd album), I wrote about the American people who are just… lost, and well, stupid.

But I had to write about “he who shall not be named” as well. Being portrayed as a drag queen who desperately wants to please her “daddies” would certainly not make him happy, so… say hello to “Little Miss Orange Marmalade”!

I had such fun writing “Little Miss Orange Marmalade” for the third album, but it was already starting to feel a bit outdated due to more recent events. So she needed a sequel.

What would the world’s orangiest drag queen be doing these days? Well… making America simply GAG, of course! 💅

Boardgames are my obsession, and I kind of wanted to write a song about them — but every idea I had was just too stupid to entertain. Until it hit me… Analysis Paralysis (AP) is so common in almost every game/group, that it just seemed way too perfect a topic. What if someone took it too far one day?

I’m definitely playing this song every Game Night from now on, when my fellow players are taking a little too long on their turns…. 🤪

True story.

My husband and I took one of our regular trips to Mallorca to see his family. The plane trip was less than an hour. Shortly after we were picked up from the airport, the doorman from our building videocalled us to show us that he was in our apartment, walking in a few inches of water everywhere.

It was such a bizarre thing, and we immediately had to take the next flight back home. Luckily it wasn’t that much damage in the end, and insurance paid for most of it. But what a nightmare and inconvenience it was…

I was asking people for inspirations for a song, and my husband gave me this idea. Being a good kisser is mega-important. And that first kiss? “It should be pure bliss…”.

CONTAINS EXPLICIT LYRICS

The ideas for this song was suggested by a friend, who shares my love for “Daddies.”

So who is the perfect Daddy for me? A Daddy needs to be a more mature, rugged man, with some graying going on. The term “Dad Bod” was invented for him. Going to the gym is a waste of time, so he has a bit of beer belly.

Emotionally, the perfect Daddy is confident and knows what he wants. He can be a little rough and dominating sexually, but at the same time he’s sweet, sensitive, caring and protective. It’s an intoxicating mix of extremes.

The twist in the song (and real life) is that despite being a lover of Daddies, I’m now at the age where younger guys call ME “Daddy.” 🙈

I thought it would be fun to explore both sides in the same song.

Except for that one guy….

…who just can’t seem to read the room…. 🙈

Those of you who know me personally know that I fell off a cliff and broke my back when I was still a teen.

While most would see this as a tragic event, I have always seen it as something that radically changed my life for the better. Had this never happened, I would probably still be living in L.A. (a city I hate) and probably working at a Starbucks (not that there’s anything wrong with that, but I’m happy I’ve been able to work in two of my dream industries).

Basically, this event really opened my eyes, radically changed my outlook, and made me want to change everything about my life for the better.

I know a LOT of polyamorous people in relationships with two (or more) people, and I promise this song is not about any of them!! 😅

Well… I guess it’s semi-based on someone I knew a long time ago, and it’s the absolute extreme version of this person — if he could live out his absolute dream scenario. (Because, as you know, I like to be over-the-top with my lyrics).

Hopefully all of the actual sane poly people that I know who don’t go to these extremes will find the humor here… 😅

Mainly I wanted to write about how so many things in our lives can change (often drastically) over time, but that love can still endure…

He’s been a photographer, journalist and documentarian, specializing in visual storytelling. But he’s also known as an oral storyteller as well.

He just really loves to tell stories in any way possible, so this is a little story about him. His enthusiasm is infectious, and you can’t help but get swept up in it… 🥰

CONTAINS EXPLICIT LYRICS

The idea for this song was suggested by my husband. I love getting massages. I really need them, and the stronger, the better.

If the masseur is really hot, and the last 5-10 minutes end up being “playful”, then that’s always a nice bonus. But the actual massage is the most important thing, and it needs to be good.

There’s nothing more annoying when the “Happy Ending” becomes a “Happy Beginning” — and the massage is completely forgotten as the masseur just ends up using you to get off and then get paid for it. I didn’t hire a rent boy! I hired a masseur!! Total pet peeve… 😤